It is such a big word. 

I have watched The Originals Season 1 and all they talked about is hope. About how a seriously crazy cruel vampire can change himself to be a better person if he knows how many people love him exactly. This vampire is known as Niklaus Mikaelson. Niklaus doesn’t know a thing of being nice. All he cares about is himself so, Elijah, the noble vampire brother is struggling to ensure Niklaus than he can be better than what he is. The only way to do it is to tell Niklaus that he has a baby. 

To Elijah, this baby is the only ‘hope’ to bring back the kindness in Niklaus. Knowing that, Niklaus suddenly feels the tinge of happiness when he realized that someone actually belongs to him. At the end of the season, the baby was born and Niklaus was asked to name her.

“Hope. Let’s call her Hope. Hope Mikaelson.”

Because, obviously the baby is the only ‘hope’ for Niklaus to find his way back to his old kind self.

Some people will tell me that there is always hope. These are the optimists. But there are also, people that will tell me that there is no hope for me. 

I know I have walked through this week, expecting nothing, hoping for nothing. The only thing I would like to do is just to survive this pain and grow stronger. I told you before that I have studied for my tests but nothing turns out the way I want them to be. My marks are still low and I know I am breaking down but, I stand on my ground telling myself that by going down, it won’t help at all. 

At least, I have to put up a fight. But, that’s the thing, it is not that easy. Helding up your head high ain’t that waltz at all. It is hard and I know, in this battlefield, I am bleeding so badly already. Will I win this battle? Or nearly killed myself at the end of it? I don’t know. But I will let you know if anything happens. I will tell you if I win. I will tell you if I lose too.

This post is supposed to talk about hope, you know? 

But I am in the middle of my final exam so I can’t finish my writing in one sit. I have to stop and edit this post multiple times. It is pretty easy but things can change pretty easily too. It was just two days ago I thought I have hope and yesterday, I realized I have none. Then, today, here I am. Putting a stop to what I was supposed to be ‘hopeful’.

It’s okay, you know. I tried to cry, but then realized, I am out of tears already. God knows what will happen to me after all this. 

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One Response to Hope

fyumie said...

"Hey little fighter, soon it'll be brighter,"

Mimi SELALU boleh, even if you think you can't, know that Allah test because He knows you CAN get through it.. with Allah. Kan? :)


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