Archive for January 2015

Readers' Problems


So here I am when I supposed to read two books for my next assignment, reports for court case since we need to do some mock trial later on and I am the scriptwriter assistant, I need to finish a paper, study for quiz and exam and the list go on. Either I like it or not.

But, I don't feel like doing any of it. I feel like reading but I feel guilty if I read something out of my necessities.

Reading have been life to me recently. Like, seriously, I can't go on without reading a book that I choose on my own. Sometimes I wonder if reading have given a bad influence on me. It is good thing to read but if it drugs you, I don't think it can still be considered as a good thing anymore.

And also, I think I have prioritise more of my reading than my family. I feel like I have abandoned my family since I need to finish my book. Same goes to my sister. We barely spent time with each other, watching our favorite shows and stuffs. And also, both of us do not even care to go out of the room to spend time with our parents because we are reading such a freaking good book.

You know, I can see a big problem here. Really big. *cry*

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High Achievers, Please Dream Bigger


I supposed to attend a motivation talk but then, I am here, writing a post for my blog. Why? One answer for that; I'm annoyed.

Maybe because of the motivator or maybe I'm just not in the mood. It could be both tho.

The motivator however, started his speech by talking of his high-achievement. Well, it is quite impressive except to the part where he actually talk about it. He is an engineer or something but really, I don't think people care if you are a doctor yourself.

The society needs you. That is what I care about. We are not doing things so we can tell them to other people. We do things because our hearts say so and that's the only way to help this ruined world.

I think the motivator should know better that most of us are not in college to freaking achieve the highest score in exam. Really? Is that what you want me to do? To get high marks and all? It is enough that I pass the requirement. I have other dreams that do not require me to be a 4 flat student. I don't want to be a 4 flat student. I WANT TO BE ME!! What was he thinking? Is he talking to some high school students?

The motivator asked, "Do you have a dream?"

Well, if I give my answer to him, will he understands my craziness towards fictions and fantasies?

And then, he added, "Have you ever dream of getting a 4 flat?" 

Does he really want an answer for that? Can't he thinks for himself?

He can talk to other high school students. But, no, not to me.

First, he boost his achievement in the exams. Then, what? He wants us to be like him?

I'm so sorry that I do not dream that small.

I'm dreaming of saving this society from being dumb and clueless and cruel.
I'm dreaming of saving my people from unhappiness and hypocrisy.
I'm dreaming of leading my generations to books so that they understand that world is not a place to play.
I'm dreaming of a lot.

And, that's way bigger of what the motivator was talking about.

I'm sorry 4 flat is not in the list. 

I have seen and been one of those high-achievers. And, you know what? I'm not happy before than I am now. A's are just an indicator of how good your brain is but not how good your heart is. I used to force myself to be what everybody else forced me to be. But then, why am I doing that? To impress human, that know nothing but talk bad of everything?

I learnt that I have no one to impress. Even if I have people that I want to impress, I don't need to. Allah knows better. I don't need anyone to be impressed of my scholarship or my achievements back then. If I can't help other people, then I'm off as a useless person.

It is not what your major is.
It is not what your CGPA is.
It is what is in your heart.

To all high-achievers, please, I believe you should dream bigger. 

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