SPM Essay Sample: God, thank You.

It was the first day of the semester. Of course, like always, my parents have to gather enough money for my school’s fee. I didn’t know why they kept on burdening themselves while they could just send me to a normal primary school. Like years before, they have to do extra work so that they could pay the registration.

But, that’s it. When you got into a private school, all your friends are rich. So did mine. They were all rich, that the teachers thought I was among those people as well. That was the problem. When your parents sent you off to a private school to get better education, the institution actually thought that your parents were having too much money, that’s why they are sending you to a private school.

Without understanding how hard my parents have to work to support my education, all of my teachers were asking the whole class to get a few books from the Hasani Store. They need all those books to be used in the class by next week. This includes my Maths teacher.

I don’t think that they have any idea of being a private school student, but in the same time, not having much money.

Maybe, it is not just them. Maybe it was me too. I choose not to talk about our family economy situation. There must be someone to give their hand to help me with my books. My friends come from well-known families. Most of them have a kind heart. But no! I would never talk to them about anything personal. Even if  I have to secretly suffer on my own.

I was a bright student. I never get any other grades other than A for every single subject that I have except for Arabic – can’t help it. Who on Earth talking in Arabic, other than Arabics themselves?

But still, the teachers didn’t even recognize me for that. They thought of me, but never bother to know my name. I never sleep in any of my classes, but some others, who actually sleep during the lesson were much more popular than I am. It could be because my parents never show up in any parents-teachers meetings since they have to struggle with their work most of the times. So, the teachers thought it is not compulsory to notice me in the class no matter how smart I am.

To win the teachers’ attention, I have to fight with a few girls in my class, whose parents were active in attending all the meetings that we had in school. Not just that, their parents also always have some extra money to give to the school in terms of donation or whatever. Obviously, I couldn’t compete with them since I have none of that. I only have this brain inside my head, smart one but will never be noticed by anyone.
I’m smart, but I’m completely invisible. 

Back to the story, to a day where my Maths teacher came into the class. She introduced herself as Mdm. Park. She has a chubby shape for her body, but a strong jawline. I wondered how that happened. She might sound weird when I put her figure into words, but trust me, she was just normal. She has no friendly mimic but a perfect sense of humor. Again, I didn’t know how that possibly happened.

Mdm. Park told us that we should purchase an exercise book from Hasani. The book was thick and heavy, looking by the way she held it. It must consist of hundreds of pages. When she was done explaining the book, she continued on with her very first lesson for that semester. I looked around. I really hope someone would raise their hand and ask Mdm. Park regarding the price of the book.

Mom has told me to do so because she would need to know what to buy first and what to buy later. But, just like the others, I was too afraid to ask for the books’ prices on my own that I ended up knowing nothing.

That evening, I came back from school. Mom was in the kitchen, writing something in her dull book which I recognized as a financial journal of her small business. I pulled one of the kitchen chairs and sat.

“Your teachers asking for more books?” Mom asked while her hand was ticking something in her book.

“Yeah,” I answered with a slow voice.

“Did you have the total price of them?” Mom asked without taking her eyes off her book.

“No. But I know which one I need to buy first,” I explained, rushingly.

This time, Mom looked at me. Her eyebrows were raised a bit showing me how surprised she is, “My Maths teacher had asked us to finish the tutorials on the first hundred pages before next week.”   

That’s mean, I only have five days before the due.

“We will talk about it during dinner later, ok, dear? Now, go change first.”

I nodded. I knew Mom was panicked – she was biting her lower lip.

During dinner that night, Dad came home with a few pieces of chocolate cake from his employer. It was for Mom, who have been craving for cake since last week. Looking at Dad, handing the cake to Mom, I smiled. I would never know how Dad keep up with our needs, but still, he managed to fulfill most of them.

Using a calm and low tone, I told Dad about the book that I need. Dad took his face up and stared at me.

“I will buy it for you tomorrow. Leave me the details,” and I smiled. Dad will never say no. He will stay calm and say yes for whatever I wanted because he know he can trust me. I am his pride, and for that, he will do anything for me.

That night, I went to sleep with a broad smile on my face. I will have my book tomorrow and the remaining four days before I have to submit the homework.

But, during dinner on the next day, I couldn’t believe myself. Dad didn’t show up at all, not until past midnight. By that time, I was already on my bed, crying my heart out. Mdm. Park already asked the class, whether everyone already had the book. I told her that Dad will buy it for me today, so I will start doing the tutorial tonight. But of course that didn’t happen.

Mom and Dad thought I was already asleep, but the truth is, I pretended so. I didn’t want her to keep her worried and also, I couldn’t force myself to sleep, realizing that I will only have three days to finish up my homework before the due. And that will only happen if Dad managed to get me the book by tomorrow. 

What will I tell Mdm. Park when she asked me about the book the next morning?

When I was doing some monologue with my inner side, the thin wall that separated my room and my parents’ suddenly allowed me to hear my parents’ voice in a whisper. Slowly, I walked across the room and stuck my left ear to the thin wall to hear the whisper better.

“Have you gone to the book store?” Mom’s voice whispered.

“Yeah. I have checked out the price too. I couldn’t believe that the book is that expensive. It could take my lunch money for a day and I only found out about the price after I used my lunch money,” Dad sighed.

Listening to his voice, my hand ran over to my mouth and covered my lips. A sob escaped from my chest. Slowly, I dragged my feet to my bed. The night became colder than usual that even my cozy blanket my granny made for me couldn’t rid of the cold. I covered my whole body with the blanket, hoping I could feel my granny’s warmth through it, but the cold didn’t want to leave me. That night, I let myself cry silent tears and few sobs escaped under my blanket. I ensured myself to minimize the noise, not to disturb my parents.
I let the rhythm sadness lullaby me to sleep.

On the next day, before I went to school, I kissed Mom’s forehead as I told her that I will make her proud of me forever. When I kissed Dad’s rough hand, I told him the same. After what my parents had done, how worried they were, how much effort that had put to support my education, I shouldn’t make them worry about anything, right? I told myself to be brave that day and went to see Mdm. Park straight away once Dad left.

I knocked her door. She was surprised, of course, to see me early in the morning. She invited me in and allowed me to sit on the cushioned chair she has in her office. I took a long breath and told her everything. Starting from the point where I came into this school just because my parents believe this school can give me a better education and not because my parents have the money everyone else have. She didn’t move an inch, listening to my story. Her expression remained he same throughout my sad story. I couldn’t believe my eyes that after I ended the story, I actually failed at winning her sympathy.

“I believe that is your problem and not mine, young lady,” and that sentence remained burning in every inch of my body.

That evening, I went to the kitchen and helped Mom with her chores. Mom did ask about the book, but I told her that everything went fine and the teacher actually extended the due to me. I knew lying was a sin. I swear to God, I was doing that just for the sake of Mom’s happiness. I couldn’t bear her biting her lower lip again. God, please forgive me for that.

After dinner, Mom and I started to clean the table. Dad didn’t show up for dinner because he has to do extra work in the factory. I knew he was lying. I knew he was doing it for the sake of me and Mom. We both just couldn’t stand the pain, breaking the hope of our beloved ones.

Just right before I went to bed, Dad knocked on my door. He peeked through the opening slid before taking a step into my plain room. Mom was standing behind him, smiling prettily.

“I know the due date is just two days ahead, but I can’t help myself from believing that I can count on my girl,” he said, handing me the book he got from the bookstore. It was the book I needed!

I didn’t grab the book but I pushed myself to his chest. His smell was awful, but he is my Dad, my hero. He will never disappoint me. I could feel his hand going through my long hair and his breath above my head. I knew he was trying to hold back his tears.

“Dad, aren’t you hungry?” I asked him.

“I can eat an elephant right now,” he said jokingly. But I realized it wasn’t a joke. Of course he is hungry after going through a hectic day without taking his lunch.

Mom brings out the leftovers and heated them. Dad ate them hastily. I took the book and started doing my homework. I’ve only got two days more and I’ve got to be fast since Mdm. Park has no heart at all. That night, with Dad eats hastily, Mom by his side, I strived to death to finish the first fifty pages of tutorials.
A couple of days later, the due date have come and all of us have to submit our homework. With a truly dark, dark circle around both eyes, I went to Mdm. Park’s office and submit my work. I said nothing to her so did she.

A week after the due date, all of us got our marks for the homework. I couldn’t believe my eyes looking at the corner of the hundredth page of the book.

“You’ve just made your parents proud of you without my aid, young lady.”

Years after that, here I am, writing the untold story of my life.

When life gets me, I know myself better. When life gets dark, I trust myself to be stronger for the sake of Mom and Dad. When life gets harder, I believe myself for having the strength God has given me since forever.

I don’t know about the others, how can they live fighting for their friend or lover because I will do nothing for those people since they have not given me anything to fight for. My fight is for my parents because I’m living this magnificent life, thanks to these beautiful people.

If my parents can do basically anything for me, I wonder what I can’t give them. Their lives have been devoted to see my success, to see my happiness. And with that, I’m going to make my parents proud of me forever. I know God is listening and I know He will help me through this. He always knows how to work His miracle on me.

Now, I would like to say thank you to God for my parents that I am now a much better person with the education they have fought for me. And not to forget, thanks to Him, again, for giving me such a great teacher who teach me that I am capable of anything that’s coming.

God, thank You. 

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